Amazon
Wild Land, by Rebecca Hodge. Crooked Lane Books, 2020.
You know how moms are? Always wanting to get the last word? Well. Today it’s my turn.
Kimber here to tell you about one of the best books mom and I have read all year. (Hint: Juni and Tye!)
This Tender Land, by William Kent Krueger
Atria Books, 2019
A poignant coming of age novel set amid the grim backdrop of the Great Depression, This Tender Land is a Huckleberry Finn-esque type story. It’s about four children who escape a horrific Indian school by canoeing down the rivers of Minnesota to St. Louis.
And much more.
The Bitterroots, by C.J. Box
St. Martin’s Publishing Group, 2019
Ever been unsure of an author or a title but decided to dive in anyway, and discover a pleasant surprise in the process?
That’s how I felt after reading C.J. Box’s new crime thriller, The Bitterroots. True confession: I nabbed it off the library’s New shelf cuz of the cover. I mean, hey! Rugged mountains. Jet-puffed clouds. Fiery Montana meadows. And a tall, lanky cowboy.
What’s not to love?
Kimber here. Mom says it’s time for a reading wrap-up. That’s when she does her version of recently read hits and misses. Why? So you can avoid the dumpster fires. Not waste your time on doggie doo-doo that some fluff ball who couldn’t track kibble with two noses published. And grab some Good Stuff.
Me? I’m going to catch up on some zzzzs from the delicious comfort of my brand-new doggie bed, courtesy of MyPillow. (Thanks, Mom! You’re Awesome!)
But first, to books! The stinkers first. These are the titles you don’t need to waste your time on (aka, The Bad, and the Really, Really Ugly):
Penguin Random House, 2019
By Diane Les Becquets
The hair-rising Prologue starts with murder “Victim #1.” There are four victims in all. Four young women. All with an independent streak. All with trusting natures. All dead in or near the Stillwater Forest, apparently by the same psycho serial killer.
In his novel, A River Runs Through It, author Norman Maclean struggles to make sense of what happened to his family in the early 20th century and why. Set in rural Montana, this hauntingly evocative novel was made into a major motion picture in 1992. It’s directed by Robert Redford.
Lynda Cohen Loigman’s The Wartime Sisters echoes themes from A River Runs Through It. Especially the final scene featuring Tom Skerritt as Norman’s pastor father. The last message we hear Rev. Maclean deliver is called We Can Love Completely:
Wings of Fire: The Dragonet Prophecy
By Tui T. Sutherland
You know that “We who are about to die salute you” gladiator scene in Spartacus? Where Kirk Douglas is forced to duke it out to the death with another gladiator? Add some scales, talons, and wings. Stir in five dragonets who are the only hope for peace between endlessly warring dragon tribes. And you’ve got the gist of Tui T. Sutherland’s Wings of Fire: The Dragonet Prophecy. It’s Book 1 of a 12-book fantasy novel series set in the mythical land of Pyrrhia.
A war has been raging between the dragon tribes of Pyrrhia for years. MudWing dragonet Clay and four other dragonets have lived their entire lives – six years – under a mountain. Purloined from their homes as eggs, the quintet has been hidden from the rest of the world until they’re ready to fulfill their destiny. According to a mysterious Prophecy, five dragonets will end the bloodshed and choose a new queen.
Or will they?
When Clay and his spunky buddy, Tsunami, make a daring escape and return to rescue the others from their subterranean existence, everything kind of goes sideways. Inches from freedom, plucky Clay and his friend are captured by the deadly SkyWing dragon queen, Scarlet. She forces her prisoners into to-the-death gladiator battles reminiscent of Spartacus. (See? I told you so.)
Queen Scarlet’s champion is an undefeated SkyWing named Peril. She responds to Clay’s kindness. But is Peril friend or foe? And who will become queen?
A rapier wit and subtle humor enliven this delicious fantasy tale. Sutherland’s world-building is also first-rate. You can almost hear fire sizzle, smell the musty earth and feel the waves of an icy river and waterfall lap at the pages.
The plot picks up speed quickly as “huge, handsome idiot” Clay and his pals battle to escape Queen Scarlet’s evil clutches and search for their own families while trying to unravel their intertwined destinies. A fun read for older elementary or middle schoolers or anyone who enjoys exploring fantasy worlds, dry humor and traipsing in and out of dragon lairs.
Along the way we learn that old scrolls and dusty lectures can come in handy. Eating black rocks from the Diamond Sky River turns out not to be such a great idea. Peril and the Champion Shield uncover a secret.
You should also know that there’s more than one kind of dragon in Pyrrhia. The different dragon tribes are: SandWings, MudWings, IceWings, RainWings, and NightWings. And not every dragon breathes fire.
One other thing: Mud isn’t just for squishing in.
One other, other thing. And this is kind of important. Not every dragon wants the Great War to end. Like Burn. And what’s up with Morrowseer? I’d also keep an eye on Blister, ‘fize you.
But I’m getting ahead of myself.
Is this unlikely band of rag-tag dragonets really destined to fulfill a mighty Prophecy, or are they just being lured out into the open where evil stalks their every move and treachery awaits…?
Oh, the dragonets are coming
They’re coming to save the day…
3.0
For more on our rating system, click here.
The Porpoise
By Mark Haddon
Doubleday, 2019
If you don’t have anything better to do – like watch paint peel – check out a Catcher in the Rye Meets Flipper & Faulkner Wannbee. It’s called The Porpoise.
The sole survivor of a plane crash that killed her mother, Angelica is raised by her insanely rich, overprotective father, Philippe. More of a nutcase with “issues” than he a grieving widower, the guy’s a first class Creepazoid.
Angelica grows up in about 40 pages. Rumors swirl around the isolated daughter of breathtaking beauty. When a potential suitor, Darius, arrives, he guesses more than he should. He winds up hightailing it out of Daddy’s swank digs fast, with an assassin on his tail. Darius runs for his life aboard a boat, The Porpoise.
“Darius”? Seriously?
Says one breathless reviewer: “And then, over several extraordinary pages, he sails out of contemporary Britain and into ancient mythology, shedding his old self and becoming Pericles in the process.”
Great. A modern-day Don Juan wannbee who thinks he’s Pericles fleeing an abusive dad while trying to navigate into a Greek legend.
Yep. It’s that bad. A fact that does not go unnoticed by the Encyclopedia Britannica:
Pericles, play in five acts by William Shakespeare, written about 1606–08 and published in a quarto edition in 1609, a defective and at times nearly unintelligible text that shows signs of having been memorially reconstructed. …The play was based on the Classical tale of Apollonius of Tyre.
“Defective” and “nearly unintelligible text” is right.
Flickr
The Porpoise is supposedly based on Shakespeare’s play which is based on the legend of Apollonius. The brittle, overwrought and often unintelligible Porpoise also seems to be in the running for One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, Part II. As do George Wilkins’s clogged arteries.
It’s almost as if the author is so desperate to impress, he dumps every literary dust mote ever dashed onto papyrus and swashes them onto the page in one fell swoop. (If I want Shakespeare I’ll get the original, thank you very much.)
Then it’s back to Angelica, silent again. Oh, and she stops eating, too. By this time, however, she’s pretty much a footnote to a story that lurches onward focusing on Darius/Pericles.
Land, ho! Naw. Just kiddin’.
Anchor-less, the author can’t seem to decide who his protagonist is or which end is up. So he just wanders around aimlessly, spilling out endlessly descriptive passages like bread crumbs to voracious sea gulls for no discernible reason. Cuz lemme tell ya, baby. That habit neither propels nor rescues the stilted and largely incoherent story that’s already limping along on legs as wobbly as a newborn colt’s.
Pexels Stock Photo
The result is a prattling, incoherent sop that makes Benjy Compson look eloquent. (To the horror of high school English teachers everywhere, I’m not a big Faulkner fan. But Porpoise isn’t even a good knock-off of Faulkner or The Bard. That’s why I’m not linking to it. On porpoise. That’s not a typo.)
Sure, the back cover is peppered with effusive praise. But so was Proust.
With a hopelessly obtuse plot that just tries too hard, this load of horse hooey ranks right up there with a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury signifying nothing.
Indeed, it’s been years since I slogged through a book this bad. Don’t waste your time. I already did. With apologies to Flipper.
0
For more on our Rating System, click here.
Michael Vey: The Prisoner of Cell 25
By Richard Paul Evans
“Is this like a series? When’s the next one coming out? Can we get it tomorrow?”
High praise for any book, but coming from my twelve year-old son? We’re talkin’ statospheric. I mean, I had to arm-wrestle the kid for Richard Paul Evans’s new release, Michael Vey: The Prisoner of Cell 25. Good thing I’m a fast reader. I zoomed through all three hundred and twenty-six pages in two days.
I’m not kidding. Vey is a barn burner. Page-turner. Whatever.
Fourteen year-old Michael Vey is smack in the middle of life’s “armpit”: freshman year at Meriden High School. He seems like an incredibly “average” kid. The only thing that may set him apart is furious eye-blinking when he’s nervous, attributable to Tourette’s syndrome. Michael’s one – and only – friend is portly, resourceful brainiac Ostin (he was born in Texas. His mom was a poor speller. Figure it out.).
Michael would like nothing better than to be left alone and just try to survive high school, but a trio of local thugs won’t let him. They’re among the first to encounter Michael’s secret first-hand when they try “pantsing” him after school as cheerleader and drop-dead gorgeous Taylor walks by.
Michael later finds out that he and Taylor aren’t as different as he thought. They both share special electrical powers. Michael, Ostin and Taylor form the “Electroclan.” Everything’s going swimmingly until Ostin detects some coincides between Michael and Taylor that are way too similar for mere coincidence – like the fact that they were born in the same hospital, in the same state, a day apart, and that nearly all other babies born in the same hospital within that time frame died. The trio sets out to find out why. In the process, they stumble upon the “Who?” – and wish they hadn’t. Enter the darkly sunglassed, mysterious Dr. Hatch.
A megalomaniac par excellence, the ‘ethically challenged’ Hatch (that’s an understatement) has been looking for Taylor and Michael for nearly fifteen years. When Michael’s mom is kidnapped, as is Taylor, it’s up to Michael and Ostin to launch a daring rescue against seemingly overwhelming odds. They must rely on wit, tenacity and each other to succeed. But who can they trust to help? Who else is after them, and what do they want? Will the boys arrive before it’s too late? And what happened to Michael’s dad?
Evans has ranked high on my Favorite Authors short list for years, ever since The Christmas Box. As a YA novel, Vey represents a significant departure from Evans’s usual themes and treatments. It’s a different “cup of tea.” Very different. And Evans pulls it off beautifully! The story is a skillful combination of action, suspense, mystery, romance, science and humor into an imaginative fiction with characters that are real and genuine. We want to meet them again. The plot is engaging, brisk and clever. A keeper!
And the next title in the Vey series, The Rise of Elgen? Not to worry. My son and have it on hold at the library. In fact, we’re first in line.
The Last Summer of the Death Warriors
By Francisco X. Stork
Seventeen year-old Pancho is one tough hombre. And he’s royally ticked. With a deceased mother, his father recently killed in a work-related accident, and his mentally challenged sister, Rosa, dead, he lands in a New Mexico orphanage mad at the world and aiming to make the world pay. Detectives say Rosa’s death was due to “natural causes,” but Pancho suspects foul play. He formulates a plan to identify Rosa’s killer and wreak his revenge.
Pancho encounters an unexpected wrinkle when he meets D.Q. (Daniel Quentin) at the orphanage. D.Q. has authored “The Death Warrior Manifesto.” (“Rule number one: No whining.”) Impish, intellectually buoyant and devilishly mischievous in spite of a cancer diagnosis, D.Q. pegs Pancho to be a fellow “death warrior.” The Panda (priest) who runs the place assigns Pancho as D.Q.’s helper for the summer, a prospect that thrills Pancho about as much as a cat in cold bath water. Will he choose death and revenge or the way of the “death warriors” – fighting for every last shred of life and love as long as they last?
Francisco Stork’s young adult novel is gutsy. It asks tough questions and avoids patty-cake, trite answers. It engages quickly, combining elements of both a murder mystery and a romance story as main characters battle doubt, disease, abandonment, despair and their own inner demons. The novel is artfully written with realistic, three-dimensional characters and crisp dialogue (may be too gritty for gentle readers). A unique story with some unusual plot twists, Last Summer is worth a look.
Pages & Paws 