Readers have some tough decisions. Like when your TBR rivals the Empire State Building. Your library check-outs are in triple digits. The local bookstore ropes off an entire section with your name on it. Or your favorite canine has to choose between New York Steak and Rib Eye.
Kimber the Magnificent here. Being all Brilliant and Beautiful again. Still.
Wait. Where was I?
Oh yeah. Reading decisions.
Does this sound familiar, hoomans?
– You grabbed a book off Amazon because it snagged a glittering galaxy of 5 star reviews. That were probably posted by the author’s mom. Under numerous pseudonyms.
– Your reading club is gushing over its latest selection. You can’t get past page 3 without reaching for No Doze.
– The latest “bestseller” has a plot that’s as dense as a peanut butter and jelly sandwhich. Without the jelly. Or the bread.
What’s a reader to do?
First of all, relax. Deep breaths, okay? Mom and I are here to help.
Second, realize that reading isn’t a competition. Or s chore. Reading is supposed to be fun. Enjoyable. (Kimber: Well, maybe not as enjoyable as a Porterhouse Steak. What?)
Anyway, here’s the latest brilliant advice from Her Royal Momness and me. On All of the Above. At no extra charge:
Stop.
That’s right.
Just. Stop. Close the book. Put it back. And move on to something else.
It doesn’t matter how far you’ve read. The number of pages left. Or how many hours you’ve spent slogging through a book. Through gritted teeth. When you reach The Point of No Return on a book, don’t return.
That’s right. Put that book down. Send it back. Find something else.
And lose the guilt. Give yourself permission to say No.
True, not all books are easy. Some require more effort than others. That’s okay.
That snoozer that had you yawning? The stinker that made your hair ache? Just stop. Put it away. You can always pick it up again later.
But if you’re hating every minute of a book, counting the remaining pages, or forcing yourself to keep going and dreading every minute, then you’re missing the point. Of letting books into your head. And your heart. Soak into your soul. And maybe even change your life.
Speaking of “life,” Mom and I decided a long time ago that life’s too short to spend it on lousy books. That we don’t enjoy. Put us to sleep better than Sominex. Look like the neighborhood fluff ball.
Besides. With zillions of titles to choose from, you’ll always be able to find something that’s a better fit.
So to reiterate, relax. And lose the book DNF guilt. It’s so not you.
Meanwhile, Mom and I will be back shortly. Soon as one of us re-shelves a few books.
You gonna eat that?
What’s the last book you read that soaked into your soul?
We hear that much of the U.S. is jacketed in snow. And wearing icy pajamas. But Mom and I? One of us is breaking out the iced tea and A/C. Here’s why:
Where’s the iced tea?
J.A. Jance’s Exit Wounds is that rare kind of “immersion” where you forget your own address but can recite the protagonist’s entire personal history without even trying.
The 4-1-1
Is the sudden death of a jail inmate linked to the murder of a reclusive woman who lived in a dilapidated mobile home with 17 dogs? What about two other dead women in New Mexico? Are the women’s murders linked by an 85 year-old bullet? How? And the vehicular homicide in Silver Creek, AZ? Is a serial killer loose in Sheriff Joanna Brady’s county? Is a “surprise” family announcement coming from the Bradys? Will Joanna’s stay-at-home hubby’s first novel ever sell? And what about the dirty tricksher opponent is cooking up as the sheriff’s re-election campaign heats up?
A powerful tale about the darkest corners of human nature and unseen wounds that never heal… Much more.
Skillful writing. Pitch-perfect pacing. Sturdy, three-dimensional characters that almost stand up and walk. The scent of summer rain. A plot with more twists than Lombard Street. And dogs! All make Exit Wounds unputdownable so far.
So, hey! It may be winter. Much of the country may be in a deep freeze. But reading this fast-paced mystery/suspense/thriller, one of us is sweating with this edge-of-your-seat Whodunit set in Cochise County, Arizona. In July.
So if anyone needs Mom or me, we’ll be in our blanket fort. Living inside these pages until further notice. While sipping iced tea (Hi, Mom.)
What’s the last book that made you a ‘functional’ ghost in your own life?
A one-two punch of frigid weather combined with Super Dad’s convalescence has kept us stuck inside way too long this month. So we read alot. Saw a lot of Formula 1 racing. And wound up watching way too many Matt Damon Movies.
Kimber: Remind me to re-up Mom’s private chocolate stash, okay?
Anywho, one of us realized that some of Matt’s ‘funnest’ movies are based on books. So. Just for kicks and grins, here is our Totally Unscientific, 100% Subjective list of Top 5 Matt Damon Movies based on books.
Teamed with Christian Bale as race car driver Ken Miles, Damon turns in a tour de force playing race car driver/designer Carroll Shelby. Shelby is recruited by Ford to build a car capable of defeating Ferrari at the 1966 24 Hours of Le Mans.
Following his wife’s untimely death, Los Angeles journalist Benjamin Mee (Matt Damon) quits his job, buys Rosemoor Wildlife Park, and moves with his two kids onto the property. Though closed for years, Rosemoor is still home to many animals. Mee opens his heart and his checkbook and works with the small staff to renovate and reopen the zoo.
Based on the book of the same title by Benjamin Mee.
Damon plays astronaut Mark Watney, who’s presumed dead after a fierce storm on Mars. He’s left behind when the rest of the crew departs the red planet for Earth. With limited supplies, Watney must figure out how to survive on the hostile planet while NASA and his crew mates try to bring him home.
Damon plays struggling young lawyer Rudy Baylor in this David vs. Goliath legal thriller. When an insurance company refuses coverage for a mom’s dying son, Baylor fights the corrupt corporation in court.
The Nazis steal countless pieces of art during WWII and hide them. Some over-the-hill art scholars, historians, architects and other experts form a unit to retrieve as many of the stolen masterpieces as possible. The mission becomes more urgent when the team learns about Hitler ordering the destruction of the artworks if the Third Reich falls. Damon plays Lieutenant James Granger, museum curator.
Someone you know has a loved one in ICU/CCU. You care. Want to help. But you’re not sure how. Here are 15+ ways you can help a patient in ICU/CCU. Based on recent experience a la Her Royal Momness and Super Dad:
PRAY.
VISIT IF YOU CAN. Patients often feel comforted by hearing a familiar voice and sensing your physical presence. Be sure to check with the hospital in advance regarding visiting hours and policies.
PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE DO NOT ASK for directions to the hospital. ICU patients may not even know where they are, let alone how to get you there. Get the name and address of the hospital from someone else. Figure out how to get there on your own.
COMMUNICATE with Nurses: Check in with them to understand how long to stay, what stimulation the patient can handle, and if they need anything.
AVOID PLATITUDES: “Everything happens for a reason,” “Stay strong,” etc. Phrases like this can come across as dismissive or trite. Better: “You’re in our daily thoughts and prayers” or “We’re here for you.”
HELP WITH PERSONAL CARE: Ask the nurse if you can comb the patient’s hair, put a cool cloth on their forehead, etc.
REMIND AND REORIENT. The patient may feel confused and disoriented. Tell them the day, time, and what’s happening. Let them know how their favorite sports team is doing or what the weather is like. Keep your voice gentle and low.
FOLLOW HYGIENE RULES. Wash your hands/use hand sanitizer before entering and leaving their room. Every. Time. Gown and glove up as directed. Avoid touching equipment.
AVOID inanities like “Get well soon” or “best wishes for a speedy recovery.” There’s no such thing as a “speedy recovery” vis-a-vis ICU. Better: “We’re pulling for you!” or “Hope you feel better and get stronger every day.”
DO NOT SEND FLOWERS. Most hospitals won’t allow flowers in the ICU due to infection risks (pollen, mold, bacteria). Save the bouquets for later. Consider simple gifts instead: puzzles, books, soft blankets (check hospital policy), or non-food items that aren’t strong-smelling. Always call the hospital first.
HOLDING the patient’s hand or providing a gentle touch can be very reassuring. Check with the nurses first.
If the patient is SEDATED, TALK TO THEM anyway. Per ICU nurses, the patient can hear when under sedation. They just can’t respond. A calm, familiar voice can be immensely comforting and reassuring. Super Dad can recall hearing snippets of conversation while sedated. Also bits and pieces from the books I brought to read aloud (“Inkheart” by Cornelia Funke. In case you’re wondering. And “Henry V.” Nobody’s perfect).
SUPPORT the Patient by supporting their Family: Food, coffee, small gift or gas cards can be very helpful.
Speaking of which, GIFT CARDS for the hospital cafeteria are terrif! On-site cafeterias are hugely convenient, enabling the patient’s fam to grab a snack or meal without leaving the hospital campus. The food is usually very good. It’s also very expensive. (A piping hot bowl of tomato basil soup wasn’t exactly what Mom had planned for Christmas Day. But it hit the spot nonetheless.)
OFFER to do chores for the patient’s household (collect mail, groceries, lawn, etc.).
PLEASE REFRAIN from discussing or referencing future plans, activities or events until/unless the patient indicates an interest in same. Events or plans that are weeks or months down the road are unfathomable and may feel overwhelming to someone who’s critically ill. Remember: One. Day. At. A. Time.
Ugh
ALSO: Remember to thank the NURSING STAFF. These highly skilled professionals are amazing‼️💯 Yea, nurses! 👏👏👏
WHEN SOMEONE says, “Let me know if you need anything,” ask, “What can you do?”
A brand new day!
FINALLY, one of the best “gifts” you can give an ICU patient is time. Don’t be in a hurry. Don’t expect them to “bounce back” or return to “normal” schedules or activities any time soon. They’ve just been thru the wringer. ICU is a traumatic experience. Physically. Mentally. Emotionally. Getting back to “normal” can take weeks or months. Or more. So don’t rush them. Give them the time and space they need to recover. Heal. Decompress. In every respect. On their timetable. Not yours.
Nothing in this post should be construed as medical advice. Always consult your doctor.
***
When will we get back to book blogging? Good question! No idea. But we’ve got some ideas in the pipeline. In case you’re wondering, Buttercup. So thanks for your patience. We appreciate every kind word and note of encouragement. You’re PAWsome!
Kimber here. Letting you know that Super Dad is out of ICU. And that nasty hospital place. Ninety miles from home. And ME! The nerve! (For background, see January 1 post.)
So we’re taking a U-turn on the blog today. Hope you don’t mind, Sweet Cakes. And if you do? Tough bouncies, Toots. Cuz Super Dad and Her Royal Momness have been away for four weeks. Four. Weeks. Eleven days in that nasty hospital place for Dad: Acute Hypoxic Respiratory Failure and Aspiration Pneumonia. And a bunch of other yucky stuff. It meant eight days in ICU. Three days on life support. Two+ weeks of initial convalescence at my brother’s house. Nearer the hospital. Not that I was counting or anything.
Never fear! Yours Truly is on the job, taking care of Super Dad.
They’ve been away since December 22! Missed Christmas completely. They say coming home to a houseful of Christmas decorations and unopened gifts on January 17 was “very weird.” But Dorothy Gale got it right: “There’s no place like home!” (I don’t know what the big deal is about Dorothy. We all know Toto was the brains of that outfit.)
Anyway, we’re gonna do Part I of what the hoo-mans learned from that hospital experience thingy. Throwin’ this is in for free. Stay tuned for Part 2 later. Here goes:
12+ ICU DOS and DONT’S. Based on recent experience. Consider it a Public Service Announcement:
***
“He’s in ICU.” Three words no one wants to hear. But when you know someone who has, what can you do? How can you help a close friend or loved one who’s just heard those words?
Here are some tips, suggestions and 12+ Dos and Don’ts on how you can help someone with a family member in or recently discharged from ICU/CCU:
FIRST, the patient’s family is probably in shock. No one plans to wind up in ICU.
So DON’T PRESS FOR DETAILS OR UPDATES. They’ve just walked into a war zone. They may not know which end is up, let alone how to communicate same. They may not have all the details on their loved one’s condition, diagnosis, or prognosis. Or be in a place where they can process that info. Be patient. Get updates from others or a family spox if you can.
Additionally, admission to ICU/CCU can be SUDDEN AND UNEXPECTED. Family members may arrive at the hospital with nothing but the clothes on their back. Can you grab or get some personal belongings to them? A change of clothes? Reading glasses? Soap? Shampoo? Lotion? Toothpaste and toothbrush, etc.
Offer to MANAGE LOGISTICS if you can. Be the point person to update other friends/family. With their approval, set up a Private Facebook group as a central repository of information to avoid duplicating effort (exhausting and time-consuming). Help arrange visitor rotations so family members can rest.
⭐️Here are some additional Dos and Don’ts for family members with a loved one in ICU/CCU: ⭐️
DO:
PRAY. First and foremost. If you’re not sure how or where to start, check out Samaritan’s Purse or the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association (Google is your friend.)
DO VISIT IF YOU CAN. Your presence is a huge gift to those with a loved one who’s critically ill. Be sure to check with the hospital in advance regarding visiting hours and policies. Your calm presence can be very comforting.
DO ‘GO GREYHOUND’. If you can get family members to and from the ICU for visits, offer to drive. Be on time.
DO OFFER TO PICK UP up any necessary medical supplies. So the family has one less thing to worry about logistically.
DO COMPILE A CARE PACKAGE for when the patient is discharged. Include appropriate items as indicated/needed like anti-bacterial wipes, a box of tissue, herbal teas. Lysol spray disinfectant. Honey. O.J. A roll or two of Life Savers. Lip balm. Soothing lotions, a cozy blanket or warm socks, etc.
DO BUY THEM A GAS CARD.
DO CONSIDER A GIFT SUBSCRIPTION to Netflix or Apple TV, etc. (Tip: Formula 1 racing a la Netflix’s “Drive to Survive” is addictive. Just sayin’.)
DO OFFER TO WALK THEIR DOG. Hellllloooo?
DO COOK AND DELIVERmeals, with their approval. Focus on healthy, nutritious meals with lean protein (poultry. fish, legumes) and fresh produce. Bring food in disposable containers they don’t need to wash or return. Label and date each item so they’re easily identifiable when grabbing them out of the fridge/freezer.
IF THEY’RE A READER, DO consider an Audible subscription or some audio books from the library.
DO send a GET WELL CARD. A real one. Like, paper.
DON’T 1. DO NOT CALL. Those with a loved one in ICU are running on fumes and adrenaline. A phone call can be intrusive and disorienting, esp. if it comes when they’re in conference with a provider or other medical professional. They’ll call when they’re able. Message, email or text instead. End your texts/messsges with “no need to respond” to give them space and room to decompress.
DON’T EXPECT quick responses to communiques. Or chit-chat. Per the above, those with a critically ill loved one are EXHAUSTED. They may not have the energy to converse. Just be there. Sitting with them quietly or offering a hug is huge.
DON’T say “Call if you need anything.” Newsflash: Most people won’t. Those with seriously ill loved ones are under intense stress. They may feel overwhelmed. Hit by a tsunami. Don’t add to that by expecting them to call you with a list. Besides. They may not even know what they “need.” Their whole world has imploded. Been reduced to 3 letters: ICU. So take the initiative. Think of what YOU’D want. Google. Check with nurses. Go Nike. And just do it.
DON’T TAKE IT PERSONALLY if someone with a loved one in ICU doesn’t return your call or respond to a message right away. They’re not being rude. They’re prioritizing.
DON’T say “KEEP ME POSTED” or “Keep me updated.” That puts the ball back into the family’s court. Hellllo? Their plate is full. They don’t need anything else. So kindly don’t ask for or expect individual updates. See “Don’t press for details” and “Manage Logistics” above.
FINALLY: ➡️ The REAL WORK of recovery begins AFTER hospital discharge. It can be draining + exhausting for both patient and caregiver (family).
You can help by offering to “spell” the home caregiver so they can grab a shower, some fresh air, or a nap. Give them a break so they can recharge their batteries.
BTW. Chocolate can work wonders. Just sayin’. 😎 – Mom
For companion commentary, keep an eye out for 15+ Ways You Can Help an ICU Patient. Coming soon.
Disclaimer: Nothing in this post should be construed as medical advice. Always consult your doctor.
I don’t know about your neck of the dog run, but here in the Northwest it’s been pouring rain for so long, I may be sprouting gills.
Not that I mind, mind you. Mom says this is great reading weather. Something about curling up by the fire with a good book. I don’t really get it. I just like sitting in her lap while she turns pages. And tells me what a “good dog” I am.
As if I didn’t know that already.
Anyway, here are 10+ top picks fur wet weather. (That’s not a typo.) These books are brisk and engaging. With good solid story lines. Lots of adventure. As much “flavor” and “texture” as those beef broth and steak treat thingies Mom makes. And of course sparkling canine personalities. Like mine. You’ll enjoy these even if you’re a feline fan. (Yech! Can’t believe I just said that.):
2. Dog On It: A Chet and Bernie Mystery– Spencer Quinn. (Told from the dog’s point of view) A good ‘ole fashioned “whodunit” mystery with a dog who’s way smarter than Bernie, his crime-solving human. Laugh out loud funny in places.
3. Where the Red Fern Grows – Wilson Rawls. Old Dan. Li’l Ann. A young boy growing up in the Ozarks and sacrificial love. Bring tissue.
5. The Empty City (Survivors #1) – Erin Hunter. Lucky is a golden-haired mutt with a nose for survival. He’s always been a loner, relying on his instincts to get by. Then the Big Growl strikes. Suddenly the ground is split wide open. The Trap House is destroyed. And all the longpaws have disappeared. Is it time to find a Pack?
6. The Journey Back – Priscilla Cummings. #2 in the Red Kayak series. Not strictly a dog book. But Digger’s daring escape from a juvenile detention facility includes hijacking a tractor trailer, “borrowing” a bicycle, stealing a canoe, and befriending a stray mutt who becomes Digger’s best friend.
7. Puppies, Dogs, and Blue Northers – Gary Paulsen. Minnesota author and dog musher Gary Paulsen reflects on the growth of his sled dogs as he and his animals discover the world around them.
An abandoned, half-feral border collie reluctantly taken in by author Jon Katz, Izzy becomes a hospice dog. Somehow Izzy learns what can’t be taught: how to help the dying leave this world with dignity – “Oh! A dog! Where on earth did you come from, you handsome thing?” – and how to best comfort those left behind.
Lenore – from the Edgar Allen Poe poem – is a “portable happiness generator.” “The UPS driver threatened to steal her,” says Katz. Big hearted and good natured, Lenore can pierce the armor of the hardest heart. As Katz battles a deep depression and phantoms from his past, the rambunctious Lab pup gently reminds him why he wanted to work with animals in the first place.
Set in first century Jerusalem, The Dog Who Was There is a heart-warming, surprising story about a little dog, Barley (that’s not a typo), and a Teacher from Galilee. This wonderful story is soaked in loss, loyalty, sadness, promise, and Great Joy. I’ve never read anything quite like it. You won’t want to miss this one.
“Kimber, what do you think is better? Book or movie?”
Depends, says I, Kimber the Magnificent. Usually on whether we’re reading or watching before or after dinner. Lemme backtrack for a min and explain-ish.
Book Memories
Her Momness has been skipping down Memory Lane via books for much of the summer. She’s re-visited a ton and a half of old favorites. See: The Dog Days and Children’s Classics.
Poppins?
The other day Mom re-read Mary Poppins, by P.L. Travers. Just a few days after watching the Disney movie with Julie Andres and Dick Van Dyke. Having read and watched both versions within a few days of each other, Her Momness was somewhat astonished. At how far apart they are.
Granted, there are things you can and can’t do on the silver screen that you can do in a book. Some book scenes just don’t translate well onto film. But in the case of Mary Poppins The Book vs. Mary Poppins the Movie, the two are almost oceans apart. (We loved Saving Mr. Banks, thank you very much.)
Kimber here. With a question: Where do your best friends live?
The Book Place
Some of our BFFs live at The Book Place. Where they have row after row of books! All lined up on shelves, just waiting to be checked out and read Also…. Oh. Wait. Mom is butting in again. So I’ll let her tell you more and give you some additional background:
Mom: There’s something inspirational about a library. Being in the massed presence of so many authors is like snuggling under a cozy quilt on a snowy day. It’s like Christmas, Independence Day and the First Day of Summer all rolled into one.
Okay. We admit it. One of us is totally blown away by the blog meisters who crank out four or five posts a week (Hi, Mom). Even worse: those who post on a daily basis.
We’ll admit it again: One of us is a teensy-weensy bit envious. (Hi again Mom.)
How do these folks manage it? And manage to churn out interesting, informative, engaging and otherwise superlative posts day after day, week after week?
Where do they find the time? Where do they get ideas? When do they sleep? Do they own a cat? (We also admit to some serious canine bias here, but that’s another story.)
We admire these folks. Their dedication. Their discipline. Their lack of a life outside the blogosphere?
It’s amazing.
A decision
We made a decision awhile back. In case you haven’t already noticed, we decided not to be one of them. Unless it comes naturally. Flows like clear water over a precipice. Warm honey out of a jar. Common sense out of political candidates. Well, you know what we mean.
And something amazing happened. The less we stressed about blogging, the easier it became. (Okay, so one of us is easily amazed :)
Not that we don’t plow into writer’s block now and then. That little curmudgeon seems to be the bane of all writers at least now and then. But we don’t stress about it.
When the words don’t come – and sometimes they don’t – we bail. Go for a walk. Eat pizza. Pick daisies. Watch Lucy and Ethel. Count stars. Call Mom’s sister 14 states away. Listen to Puccini arias. (Yes, really.)
Instead of forcing it, we disconnect. Switch gears. Do something different. If Mom’s really desperate, she bakes.
Give yourself a breather
Know what? The muse returns. She may be “MIA” for a day, for weeks or for longer, but given time, the creative little sprite comes back. (When she does, we usually can’t get her to shut up.)
Taking a breather from writing can be like swapping out a dead battery for a fresh one. There’s no sense trying to work off a battery with no juice. Call that horse dead and find a new one. Give yourself a break. A chance to “power down” and recharge. It may seem counter-productive. But the renewed energy and vitality are worth it.
So if the writing muse has skipped town on you, be patient. Disconnect. Switch gears. Do something different. Take time to recharge. (We wouldn’t necessarily recommend baking, but whatever works.) If you’re a writer, the muse will return.
Works every time
One last thing. When writer’s block hits, read. Really. Put down your pen. Lock up your keyboard. Pick up a book and dive in.
There’s nothing like nestling behind a good book with a great story – or even a mediocre one – to tempt the muse into returning. We can’t explain it. We just know it works. Every time. Kinda like dessert.
What do you do to overcome writer’s block?
***
If you’re struggling with writer’s block, here are some great reads to recharge the ‘ole batteries. These aren’t how-tos. They’re just fun and engaging.
You know Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and... Oh, wait. Wrong season. Silly Mom. Never fear. For I, Kimber the Magnificent, shall get us back on track with our latest stroke of blogging brilliance. Hey. It’s what I do! (Well. Mom helped. A little.)
Anyway, you know Austen, C.S. Lewis, Hugo, Dickens and Dostoevsky. You know Dr. Seuss. E B. White. Charles Schultz (Some of Mom’s faves. Go figure).
The Biggies.
But guess what, Cookie? These big names aren’t the only hoomans who can fill a book with something worth reading. Or engage. Entertain. Inspire and elucidate. (Kimmi: No idea what that last one means. Mom’s idea. And you know She Who Must Be Obeyed, right?)
Favorites
Well. These “big” hoomans are all good reads. But guess what again? Some of our favorite authors are indie authors. They may not be :biggies” or household names. Yet. But Her Momness and I decided to highlight some indie authors. Cuz even though their names may not rhyme with Suzanne Collins or J.K. Rowling, they are still uber talented. And worth reading. (The Kimster: I wanted to give them all a one year subscription to the Steak of the Month Club. But I kinda got over-ruled on that one. Nobody’s perfect.)
You’ll want to keep an eye on all of these authors. Several have new books out or are working on new titles. So here, in no particular order, are 12 indie authors you really oughtta get to know. Cuz we say so again:
Pages & Paws 