Pages & Paws

Writing, Reading, and Rural Life With a Border Collie


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Seriously PAWSome!

Hello Friends!

Happy New Year!

Kimber the Magnificent here to tell you something you probably already know (if you don’t, you should):

MOM IS SERIOUSLY PAWSOME!!

She not only cooks a mean T-bone steak that’s all luscious, delicious and flavorful, mouth-watering and juicy and…

Wait. Where was I?

Oh yeah. Mom. Seriously PAWsome. As in, Bibliophile Extraordinaire and World Class Reader. Like this:

You read that right: Mom and I read 403 books in 2022. (Well, it was mostly me. But Mom chipped in. A little.)

It’s a New Personal Reading Record for most books in one year. And nope, we didn’t review every book. Cuz that’s just silly.

I’d let Mom tell ya more. ‘Cept she’s snoozing. For obvious reasons. I ‘spect she’ll wake up around spring. Or maybe later.

You gonna eat that? Askin’ for a friend.

What are your eating… I mean, reading goals for 2023?


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4 NEW Award Winners (It’s Not What You Think!)

Her Grumpiness: “Ding! Ding! Ding! Kimmi, we have some winners!”

The Magnificent One: A winner for what?

HG: “Winners for Worst Book of The Century,” saith Her Grumpiness. “We’re talkin’ Barf-o-rama on Steroids here.”

TMO: The century? Really?

HG: “Okay, Kimmi. How ‘bout Worst Books We Read in the Last Month?”

TMO: Better, Mom. Should I get the Tylenol?

HG: Maybe. First, let’s run through the list of Four Worst Books of December, the condensed version:

Note: We received complimentary copies of these books via Reedsy/Discovery in exchange for honest reviews.

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The KIMBER AWARDS 2.0

You’ve heard of the Academy Awards. The Emmys, Tonys, and Golden Globes. But you may not have heard of The Biggest Bow Wow of them all:

The Kimber Awards.

What? You haven’t heard of this prestigious honor? Maybe that’s cuz I, Kimber, just made it up. 

Well, okay. Mom helped. A little. She lobbied for “World’s Most Super Duper, Seriously Splendid, Extra Excellent, Terrifically Talented, Genuine Genius-y, and All-Around Awesome Author Awards.”

I nixed that. After all. Someone has to be the adult in the room. (Well, okay again. It was mostly me. But Mom helped a bit.)

Where was I? Oh yeah. The Kimber Awards. … Continue reading


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Thanks! You’re PAWsome!

Mom and I wanted to take a moment to thank those who’ve recently joined our little Pages & Paws community. Glad to have you. You’re like, totally PAWsome! So Welcome Aboard!

A few FYIs:

  1. The holidays are just around the corner. We traditionally focus on the holidays during the holidays. We’re just funny that way. So stay tuned for further flashes of seasonal brilliance and frivolity.
  2. If there’s a particular genre, title, or other things bookish you’d like to see on the blog that fits our submission guidelines, holler.
  3. Bookish guest posts are encouraged. We sometimes offer select authors guest posts, too. (If we really, really like you. Or you bribe us with extra crispy bacon.) For more info., click here. Be sure to put “Pages & Paws Guest Post” in the subject line so we don’t miss it.

Thanks again. Don’t be a stranger!


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Happy Birthday Mom!

Pssst! Kimber here. Being all magnificent and everything. Telling you that today, one of my favorite people turns 100 years old! What? Well, okay. Maybe not One. Hundred. Maybe just “older than dirt.”

Anyway, I thought I’d mark this auspicious occasion by sharing a post by Her Momness from 2014. You know. About 100 years ago. Wait. Where was I? Oh yeah. The post is called “Like Coming Home.” It’s about growing up as a voracious reader and book lover.

You don’t want to miss this. Cuz it’s really, really good. (Maybe not as a good as a nice, thick T-bone steak. Nobody’s perfect.)

Anyway, it goes like this:

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A Summer Reading Record?

Do you do Summer Reading Programs?  Mom used to. She’s been kinda straddlin’ the fence on SRPs since about 2018. Why? Cuz she set a personal record for books read that summer: 156 books. From June 1 to August 31. No. really. Click here for more.

She hasn’t jumped into an SRP full-bore since. “Cuz Kimmi, how in the world am I gonna top 156 books in three months?”

Well. You know Her Momness. I bribed her with chocolate.

A New Record?

So. Did Mom set a new personal record for Summer Reading? 

Well, not quite. We tried. Really. And we got close.

But there was so much other stuff goin’ on this summer, if ya know what I mean. (And yes, I totally aced that semi-annual check-up at the vet’s. Thanks for askin.’)

Including audio books and read-alouds, Mom read 139 books this summer. It’s not 156+. But not bad, eh?  (Apparently, some people will do almost anything for a Triple Chocolate Meltdown a la mode.)

You can find some of Mom’s summer favorites at 6 Best Reads of Summer. 

Honorable Mentions:

I’d let Mom tell you more herself. But she’s snoozing right now. Or “resting up.” Or something.

Psssst!

Mom hasn’t tackled a Goodreads Reading Challenge since shortly after the Ark made landfall. The last one she did was in 2018: 383 books. In one year. She says, “No way can I do that again, Kimster. Not even close.”

But I’m scouting up new supplies of chocolate. Just don’t tell Mom yet, okay?

You gonna eat that?

 


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Don’t Be This Author – or – How to Get a Negative Review in 3 Easy Steps

Shhh! Mom’s snoozing. So it’s just us, okay?

Can we talk? Like, about book reviews? Cuz Mom and I are getting flooded with requests for book reviews. We love it! But we also want to be efficient. So we decided to set and clarify some basic ground rules. As in, what to avoid. Or Don’t Be This Author. With this kind of book.

So, here’s how to get a negative review in three easy steps (Examples taken from actual events. Names and places sort of changed to protect the not-so-innocent.):

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Who’s #1 & A New Reading RECORD!

Ho! Ho! Ho! Merry Christmas!

Kimber here. Her Momness  – aka: ‘Ole Bleary Eyes – would send Christmas greetings herself. But she’s just settled her brains for a long winter’s nap.

“Why is Mom napping during The Most Wonderful Time of the Year?!” you ask.

Good question.

25 in 8

Short answer: Mom just bested her own book reading record.  The new trophy reads: 25 Books in 8 Days.

#1, Baby!!

I’m not makin’ this up.  In fact, she wears the crown for Top Reviewer at Reedsy/Discovery this month. And I don’t mean in the top ten. Nope. Mom is THE Top Reviewer. As in, #1.

See:

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Author Ann Kiemel & How Do You Spell “Success”?

 

Pssst! Hey, writer! Yeah. You. Over here. I have a question for ya. Well, a few:

  • What’s your goal as a writer?
  • Do you want to sell millions of copies of your book (who doesn’t?)?
  • Make the New York Times Bestseller list?
  • What’s your definition of “success”?
  • How will you know when you’ve arrived?

Or does “bestseller status” seem like an elusive dream, a “happily ever after” fairytale?

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44 Best Fantasy Books for Kids

We’re not big fans of Halloween. But we do enjoy a good fantasy story sans ghoulish ghastliness. (Isn’t that a great word? Mom thought it up.)

Anyway, with Hallo-yuck coming up, Mom and I decided rather than focus on ghoulish tricks, we put together a list of treats instead: 44 Best Fantasy Books for Kids. Because, woof! Nobody does ‘imaginating’ better than kids! (Well, there was that one Labradoodle who…) Wait. That’s another story.

Kindly note that we’re using “fantasy” in its broadest sense. Like: Anything that could not exist within our own world. Make-believe in its purest form. Usually includes something supernatural or magical as primary elements of the plot, theme, or setting. Like talking animals. (One of us is super big on that.)

It’s easy to get Fiction and Fantasy confused. (One of us who shall remain nameless does that, too.) So here’s a basic primer describing the differences between the two genres. There are three main diffs, via Difference Between:

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