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Writing, Reading, and Rural Life With a Border Collie

Category Archives: Announcements


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15+ Ways You Can Help an ICU Patient – Part 2 of 2

Someone you know has a loved one in ICU/CCU. You care. Want to help. But you’re not sure how. Here are 15+ ways you can help a patient in ICU/CCU. Based on recent experience a la Her Royal Momness and Super Dad:

  1. PRAY.
  2. VISIT IF YOU CAN. Patients often feel comforted by hearing a familiar voice and sensing your physical presence. Be sure to check with the hospital in advance regarding visiting hours and policies.
  3. PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE DO NOT ASK for directions to the hospital. ICU patients may not even know where they are, let alone how to get you there. Get the name and address of the hospital from someone else. Figure out how to get there on your own.
  4. COMMUNICATE with Nurses: Check in with them to understand how long to stay, what stimulation the patient can handle, and if they need anything.
  5. AVOID PLATITUDES: “Everything happens for a reason,” “Stay strong,” etc. Phrases like this can come across as dismissive or trite. Better: “You’re in our daily thoughts and prayers” or “We’re here for you.”
  6. HELP WITH PERSONAL CARE: Ask the nurse if you can comb the patient’s hair, put a cool cloth on their forehead, etc.
  7. REMIND AND REORIENT. The patient may feel confused and disoriented. Tell them the day, time, and what’s happening. Let them know how their favorite sports team is doing or what the weather is like. Keep your voice gentle and low.
  8. FOLLOW HYGIENE RULES. Wash your hands/use hand sanitizer before entering and leaving their room. Every. Time. Gown and glove up as directed. Avoid touching equipment.
  9. AVOID inanities like “Get well soon” or “best wishes for a speedy recovery.” There’s no such thing as a “speedy recovery” vis-a-vis ICU. Better: “We’re pulling for you!” or “Hope you feel better and get stronger every day.”
  10. DO NOT SEND FLOWERS. Most hospitals won’t allow flowers in the ICU due to infection risks (pollen, mold, bacteria). Save the bouquets for later. Consider simple gifts instead: puzzles, books, soft blankets (check hospital policy), or non-food items that aren’t strong-smelling. Always call the hospital first.
  11. HOLDING the patient’s hand or providing a gentle touch can be very reassuring. Check with the nurses first.
  12. If the patient is SEDATED, TALK TO THEM anyway. Per ICU nurses, the patient can hear when under sedation. They just can’t respond. A calm, familiar voice can be immensely comforting and reassuring. Super Dad can recall hearing snippets of conversation while sedated. Also bits and pieces from the books I brought to read aloud (“Inkheart” by Cornelia Funke. In case you’re wondering. And “Henry V.” Nobody’s perfect).
  13. SUPPORT the Patient by supporting their Family: Food, coffee, small gift or gas cards can be very helpful.
  14. Speaking of which, GIFT CARDS for the hospital cafeteria are terrif! On-site cafeterias are hugely convenient, enabling the patient’s fam to grab a snack or meal without leaving the hospital campus. The food is usually very good. It’s also very expensive. (A piping hot bowl of tomato basil soup wasn’t exactly what Mom had planned for Christmas Day. But it hit the spot nonetheless.)
  15. OFFER to do chores for the patient’s household (collect mail, groceries, lawn, etc.).
  16. PLEASE REFRAIN from discussing or referencing future plans, activities or events until/unless the patient indicates an interest in same. Events or plans that are weeks or months down the road are unfathomable and may feel overwhelming to someone who’s critically ill. Remember: One. Day. At. A. Time.
Ugh

ALSO:
Remember to thank the NURSING STAFF. These highly skilled professionals are amazing‼️💯 Yea, nurses! 👏👏👏

WHEN SOMEONE says, “Let me know if you need anything,” ask, “What can you do?”

A brand new day!

FINALLY, one of the best “gifts” you can give an ICU patient is time. Don’t be in a hurry. Don’t expect them to “bounce back” or return to “normal” schedules or activities any time soon. They’ve just been thru the wringer. ICU is a traumatic experience. Physically. Mentally. Emotionally. Getting back to “normal” can take weeks or months. Or more. So don’t rush them. Give them the time and space they need to recover. Heal. Decompress. In every respect. On their timetable. Not yours.

Capiche?

Me and Super Dad!

For companion commentary, see prior post: 12+ ICU Dos and Dont’s.

Nothing in this post should be construed as medical advice. Always consult your doctor.

***

When will we get back to book blogging? Good question! No idea. But we’ve got some ideas in the pipeline. In case you’re wondering, Buttercup. So thanks for your patience. We appreciate every kind word and note of encouragement. You’re PAWsome!


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12+ ICU Dos and Dont’s – Part 1 of 2

Kimber here. Letting you know that Super Dad is out of ICU. And that nasty hospital place. Ninety miles from home. And ME!  The nerve! (For background, see January 1 post.)

So we’re taking a U-turn on the blog today. Hope you don’t mind, Sweet Cakes. And if you do? Tough bouncies, Toots. Cuz Super Dad and Her Royal Momness have been away for four weeks. Four. Weeks. Eleven days in that nasty hospital place for Dad: Acute Hypoxic Respiratory Failure and Aspiration Pneumonia. And a bunch of other yucky stuff. It meant  eight days in ICU. Three days on life support. Two+ weeks of initial convalescence at my brother’s house. Nearer the hospital. Not that I was counting or anything.

Never fear! Yours Truly is on the job, taking care of Super Dad.

They’ve been away since December 22! Missed Christmas completely. They say coming home to a houseful of Christmas decorations and unopened gifts on January 17 was “very weird.” But Dorothy Gale got it right: “There’s no place like home!” (I don’t know what the big deal is about Dorothy. We all know Toto was the brains of that outfit.)

Anyway, we’re gonna do Part I of what the hoo-mans learned from that hospital experience thingy. Throwin’ this is in for free. Stay tuned for Part 2 later. Here goes:

12+ ICU DOS and DONT’S. Based on recent experience. Consider it a Public Service Announcement:

***

“He’s in ICU.” Three words no one wants to hear. But when you know someone who has, what can you do? How can you help a close friend or loved one who’s just heard those words?

Here are some tips, suggestions and 12+ Dos and Don’ts on how you can help someone with a family member in or recently discharged from ICU/CCU:

FIRST, the patient’s family is probably in shock. No one plans to wind up in ICU.

So DON’T PRESS FOR DETAILS OR UPDATES. They’ve just walked into a war zone. They may not know which end is up, let alone how to communicate same. They may not have all the details on their loved one’s condition, diagnosis, or prognosis. Or be in a place where they can process that info. Be patient. Get updates from others or a family spox if you can.

Additionally, admission to ICU/CCU can be SUDDEN AND UNEXPECTED. Family members may arrive at the hospital with nothing but the clothes on their back. Can you grab or get some personal belongings to them? A change of clothes? Reading glasses? Soap? Shampoo? Lotion? Toothpaste and toothbrush, etc.

Offer to MANAGE LOGISTICS if you can. Be the point person to update other friends/family. With their approval, set up a Private Facebook group as a central repository of information to avoid duplicating effort (exhausting and time-consuming). Help arrange visitor rotations so family members can rest.

⭐️Here are some additional Dos and Don’ts for family members with a loved one in ICU/CCU: ⭐️

DO:

  1. PRAY. First and foremost. If you’re not sure how or where to start, check out Samaritan’s Purse or the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association (Google is your friend.)
  2. DO VISIT IF YOU CAN. Your presence is a huge gift to those with a loved one who’s critically ill. Be sure to check with the hospital in advance regarding visiting hours and policies. Your calm presence can be very comforting.
  3. DO ‘GO GREYHOUND’. If you can get family members to and from the ICU for visits, offer to drive. Be on time.
  4. DO OFFER TO PICK UP up any necessary medical supplies. So the family has one less thing to worry about logistically.
  5. DO COMPILE A CARE PACKAGE for when the patient is discharged. Include appropriate items as indicated/needed like anti-bacterial wipes, a box of tissue, herbal teas. Lysol spray disinfectant. Honey. O.J. A roll or two of Life Savers. Lip balm. Soothing lotions, a cozy blanket or warm socks, etc.
  6. DO BUY THEM A GAS CARD.
  7. DO CONSIDER A GIFT SUBSCRIPTION to Netflix or Apple TV, etc. (Tip: Formula 1 racing a la Netflix’s “Drive to Survive” is addictive. Just sayin’.)
  8. DO OFFER TO WALK THEIR DOG. Hellllloooo?
  9. DO COOK AND DELIVER meals, with their approval. Focus on healthy, nutritious meals with lean protein (poultry. fish, legumes) and fresh produce. Bring food in disposable containers they don’t need to wash or return. Label and date each item so they’re easily identifiable when grabbing them out of the fridge/freezer.
  10. IF THEY’RE A READER, DO consider an Audible subscription or some audio books from the library.
  11. DO send a GET WELL CARD. A real one. Like, paper.

DON’T
1. DO NOT CALL. Those with a loved one in ICU are running on fumes and adrenaline. A phone call can be intrusive and disorienting, esp. if it comes when they’re in conference with a provider or other medical professional. They’ll call when they’re able. Message, email or text instead. End your texts/messsges with “no need to respond” to give them space and room to decompress.

  1. DON’T EXPECT quick responses to communiques. Or chit-chat. Per the above, those with a critically ill loved one are EXHAUSTED. They may not have the energy to converse. Just be there. Sitting with them quietly or offering a hug is huge.
  2. DON’T say “Call if you need anything.” Newsflash: Most people won’t. Those with seriously ill loved ones are under intense stress. They may feel overwhelmed. Hit by a tsunami. Don’t add to that by expecting them to call you with a list. Besides. They may not even know what they “need.” Their whole world has imploded. Been reduced to 3 letters: ICU. So take the initiative. Think of what YOU’D want. Google. Check with nurses. Go Nike. And just do it.
  3. DON’T TAKE IT PERSONALLY if someone with a loved one in ICU doesn’t return your call or respond to a message right away. They’re not being rude. They’re prioritizing.
  4. DON’T say “KEEP ME POSTED” or “Keep me updated.” That puts the ball back into the family’s court. Hellllo? Their plate is full. They don’t need anything else. So kindly don’t ask for or expect individual updates. See “Don’t press for details” and “Manage Logistics” above.

FINALLY:
➡️ The REAL WORK of recovery begins AFTER hospital discharge. It can be draining + exhausting for both patient and caregiver (family).

You can help by offering to “spell” the home caregiver so they can grab a shower, some fresh air, or a nap. Give them a break so they can recharge their batteries.

BTW. Chocolate can work wonders. Just sayin’. 😎 – Mom

For companion commentary, keep an eye out for 15+ Ways You Can Help an ICU Patient. Coming soon.

Disclaimer: Nothing in this post should be construed as medical advice. Always consult your doctor.


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An Update on Mom

Merry New Year!

You know it’s a merry new year because I, Kimber the Magnificent, say so.

And cuz its’ January 1 and we kinda missed Christmas this year. More on that in a min. So kindly keep your hair on, Cupcake.

Being all brilliant and everything.

Where was I? Oh yeah. I have some other things to say as we ring in the new year. (No idea what that means. But Mom seems to like it. So I do, too.)

Speaking of The Ole Curmudgeon, we thought the new year would be a good time for an update. Cuz we’ve been away from the blog since October. We’ve been away so long, in fact, that one of us forgot her login credentials. Not to fret. Being all brilliant and everything, I fixed that!

Anyway, this is the part where you read or re-read our October 1 post. If you haven’t read that yet or forgot it, now would be good. Otherwise this post won’t make any sense.

That’s okay. I’ll wait.

Continue reading →


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HARK! Kimber Speaketh on Mom-eth! (I’d Listen Up ‘Fize You)

Hark! Tis I, Kimber the Magnificent. Being all brilliant and beautiful and everything. With an important FYI about The ‘Ole Curmudgeon. You know it’s important cuz I say it is. So, I’d listen up ‘fize you, Cookie. Here it is:

Her Royal Momness, aka: The ‘Ole Curmudgeon, Her Royal Crankiness, She Who Must Be Obeyed, was diagnosed with a “chronic, progressive disease” in August. (Not cancer).

There is no cure. They can slow the disease progression. Possibly arrest it.

But they can’t cure it.

Continue reading →


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ANNOUNCEMENT: Temporary Closure to New Review Requests

Hark! Her Royal Momness Speaketh! With a Royal Announcement-eth! (I’d listen up ‘fize you!)

We are CLOSED to new review requests until further notice.  For three main reason-eths:

  1. Our TBR pile is the size of Alaska. Or maybe Mount Rushmore. We just can’t handle any more review requests until we get through the current pile. Or find a shovel. A really, really big one.
  2. We are tired of fielding requests from  authors, publishers, and publicists who clearly haven’t read our Submission Guidelines. You wouldn’t believe some of the stuff we get. That anyone who bothered to even glimpse our Guidelines would know we have zero interest in. Zip. Zero. Nada.

When folks commit The Unpardonable Sin of ignoring our Guidelines, they’re wasting our time. And theirs. Now, we used to feel obliged to respond to every review request, no matter how ridiculous or unlikely. We don’t feel that way anymore. It’s a waste of our time. So we don’t bother.

Speaking of “bother,” another reason we’re temporarily closing the review queue: You wouldn’t believe the number of authors and others who get a positive review (3.0 or above) and bail. Never to be seen or heard from again. Let alone Like, Share, and Comment. Which is a requirement for every positive review. It’s clearly stated in our Guidelines.

NEWSFLASH Buttercup: It takes a LOT of time and effort to read a book and craft a brilliant review. We don’t even charge for said genuis. So we’re not too keen on pouring time and effort into a review for an author who can’t even be bothered to take two mins to say Thanks. It’s also a good way to get burnt out. And that’s pretty much where we’re at. (But we really, really appreciate the few who do take the time to read and abide by our Guidelines. Cuz you’re really, really PAWsome. Maybe not quite as Pawsome as a T-bone steak. Nobody’s perfect.)

So there you have it, Cupcake.

We have plenty of stuff still in the blogging pipeline. In case you’re wondering, Toots. Just not accepting any new review requests until further notice.

TTFN.


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Kimber’s Update on Her 2 Fave Hoomans

What?

Kimber here. With a quick update on my two favorite hoomans. Her Royal Momness and His Royal Dadness.

If you’re a regular reader, you probably know that The Royals were waylaid by The Creeping Crud (RSV) for over a month. Mom is doing much better. So, watch out world!

Dad developed a blood clot in his leg. Most likely due to inactivity while battling RSV. Thankfully, we got him to the E.R. fast as greased lightning. Found a blood clot a la ultrasound. Got him on blood thinners right away. (The hoomans say blood clots are very dangerous. Can be deadly in minutes. In case you’re wondering.)

Not good! Not good! Red alert!

Continue reading →


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ATTN AUTHORS! BEFORE You Request a Review…

– We interrupt our regularly scheduled blogging to bring you this important news bulletin –

Mom and I spend tons of time combing through review requests and deciding what we will or won’t accept. If a book is accepted, we may spend hours and hours or days reading it. And more time crafting a brilliant and pithy review.

Huge

It’s a huge investment of time and energy. We don’t charge any fees for reviews. We don’t get a cent for doing this. Not one penny. Our time and talent is free to you, Cupcake. 

At Least

So THE LEAST YOU CAN DO is Like, Comment, and Share the Post Link for a positive review of 3.0 or above. This not only helps promote your book, it also boosts post visibility. So again:

Required

Liking, Commenting, and Sharing the Link to a positive review is a REQUIREMENT for anyone asking for a review. If you don’t do so within three days of post publication, we will remove the post.

Think Again

Don’t think we’ll do it, Toots? Think again. Reviews of the following books have been removed because the author(s) failed to adhere to our Like, Comment, and Share requirement outlined above:

The Treasure of Tundavala Gap

Storybug Picture Books

Punctuation Retreat

The Mat as a Mirror: Reflecting Stories of Women’s Strength & Confidence Through Jiu-Jitsu

Perestroika Percolates With Perspicacity

Memoir Highlights Self-Discovery After Stroke

Professional Joy Spreading and 4 New Ones For Little’Uns

July and Everything After

***

Don’t think we don’t notice. We do. 

Kimber: And you sooooo do not want to get catty-wampuss to The Old Curmudgeon. Bad idea. Really bad idea.

And to those authors and publicists who do take the time to adhere to our requirements, THANK YOU! You’re still PAWsome!

– We will now return you to our regularly scheduled blogging – 

 


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Hark! Now Taking NEW Review Requests

ANNOUNCEMENT!

If you’re lookin’ for angels cha-cha-ing through the realms of glory, singe-ing chestnuts on an open fire (Mom’s special expertise) or ringing sleigh bells, sorry to disappoint with this here announcement thingy.

Now Taking New Review Requests

But if you’ve been waiting for word about when we plan to re-open to new review requests, you’re in luck! Or gravy. Or leftover turkey. Or… something yummy.

After trying to climb out from underneath a Mount Everest backlog of review requests we had stacked up from here to breakfast, we’re finally seeing daylight. So we’re re-opening the review request queue to new requests.

Cuz today’s the day!

I, Kimber the Magnificent, officially declare Pages and Pages (Re) OPEN for new review requests.

You’re welcome. Just don’t inundate us all at once, okay? While you’re at it, kindly note that we reserve the right to decline any submission for any reason whatsoever without any explanation. Period.

PLEASE READ. THE. GUIDELINES

Our Rating System and Submission Guidelines exist for a reason, okay? So for the NINE MILLIONTH TIME, kindly save us both some time and effort by Reading Our Submission Guidelines BEFORE you hit us up with your magnum opus.

Like Santa

Cuz Mom and I? We’re kinda like Santa. We make a list. Check it twice. We find out who’s naughty and nice when it comes to review requests. Like, we know exactly who does and does not read our Submission Guidelines. Always. And believe you me, you so do not want to get on The ‘Ole Curmudgeon’s bad side(s) by submitting stuff we’re not interested in. Or committing the other Unpardonable Sin: Getting a positive review (3.0 rating or above) and failing to Like, Comment on, or Share the post within three days of publication. We know that, too. (Failure to do so can and usually does result in removal of the post.)

So I’d listen up ‘fize you.

We will now return you to our regularly scheduled cha-cha-ing.

Wait. Is that eggnog?

Submission Guidelines

 


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Our Top 10 Titles of 2024

“Yo! Wazzup?”

The Ask

Her Momness and I have been kicking back, enjoying the holidays and being lazy slugs. That’s why you haven’t seen us here lately. Then someone asked, “So, Kimber and Mom. What are your top ten titles for 2024?” Actually, it was several someones. But who’s counting?

Almost 600

Well. One of us – the sweet furry-faced one smiled sweetly at that question. The other kind of shrugged it off. (Hi, Mom.)  I mean, sheesh.  We read close to 600 titles this year. So “Top Ten” or “Best Books We Read in 2024”? Really?

Told ya!

Told ya.

But the question kept coming. Responding turned out to be harder than we thought. A lot harder. In case you’re wondering, Cupcake. And even if you’re not. But not for the reason you may think. Like this:

Continue reading →


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Kimber Awards 4.0 + Update on Mom

Being all beautiful and brilliant and everything.

We give out a super duper, totally pawsitively and magnificently splendiderous author award every once in awhile. Comes with extra pawsome sauce. It’s called The Kimber Award. Because, hey. It’s me.

We’ll get to that in just a min. So kindly keep your hair on, Toots. First an update on The Ole Curmudgeon.

Mom was in the hospital place recently. She hates hospitals. So do I. They won’t allow me inside. Silly hospitals.

Continue reading →