If we’ve said it once, we’ve said it 100 times: We do honest book reviews here. If we love your book, we say so. If we hate your book, we say so. We have like, standards. And every once in awhile we come across a “book” that’s so bad, so supremely cringeworthy, so genuinely awful, it’s enough to make our hair ache. We let you know about said stinkers so’s you don’t waste your time on them.
Kimber: Consider it a Public Service Announcement.
Search for a Stone Cold Killer by “Professor” Alan Dale Dickinson is the worst book we’ve read in recent memory. Yea, verily. If Eau de Skunk was an Olympic sport, this stinker would bring home gold. Here’s why (the short version):
Kimber here. Telling you about my new bestie, Sunny the Amazing Golden Retriever. She’s beautiful. Brave. Brilliant. Clever and resourceful. Did I mention we’re twins?
Yes siree, Lassie! Sunny is one sharp doggie. (Almost as sharp as me. Almost.) Ya see, Sunny’s a Coast Guard explosives detection dog! You get to meet Sunny and her hooman, USCG Officer Thomas, in Janet Bell’s splendiferous new book for the little’uns, Sunny the Coast Guard Dog’s Dynamite Adventure.
Buckle up!
The 4-1-1
Sunny lives in animal shelter until she’s adopted by a little boy named Jamie. Jamie’s mom, Officer Thomas, works at the Coast Guard station. Sunny wants to work, too. Turns out Sunny has a knack for “nose work.” Sunny is trained to sniff out explosives. And she’s pretty darn good at it! Through all the training, Sunny is treated with kindness, patience and positive reinforcement as she learns to be a “dog detective.” Her superpower is her nose. And riding in helicopters! Oh yeah.
It takes patience, determination abd courage to master new skills and discover her talent for sniffing out explosives. But Sunny has the heart of a champion and rises to the challenge of protecting others.
Mom: Kinda reminds me of another sweet furry face we all know and love.
Then some bad guys try to escape Officer Thomas. But there’s no escaping Sunny’s incredible nose! Kimber: “Prepare to be boarded” is something you sooo do not want to hear from the USCG if you’re up to no good. Just sayin’.
Talk about a fun book! Sunny has it all: Action. Adventure. Brisk pacing. Bright, vivid illustrations that practically leap off the page. An engaging, intriguing story that’ll grab you from the Intro and not let go until the end. It includes fascinating information about how explosive detection dogs and their hoomans train. And of course, our heroine: Sunny the Coast Guard dog. She’s smart. She’s savvy. She’s PAWsome.
Kimber: No doubt we’re related.
We loved this book! Inspiring and entertaining, Sunny is also educational without feeling like school. This book will certainly appeal to young children and those who love them. It would make a welcome addition to any home or classroom library.
Naw. You don’t have to send your submission beautifully wrapped with a personalized, handwritten note. But it doesn’t hurt 😉🐾
Note: One of us wasn’t feeling so great when this book arrived in the mail. We waited awhile to open it. And guess what? Reading this beautifully illustrated, eminently engaging story brightened our day right away. We loved it! You will, too. Besides. Who can resist that cover art?
Note: We received a complimentary copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.
Kimber: Dontcha hate it when you’re late to an appointment cuz you were so absorbed in a good book, you lost track of time? (Hi, Mom.) That’s what happened when Mom started reading E.C. Watt’s debut novel, The Witch of Flickerwood. It grabbed us in chapter one. Reeled us in hook, line, and kibble. Short version:
Addy Warner once dreamed of being a detective. But the 20-year-old sophomore is pursuing a degree in Ecology at a small college in Pennsylvania. The school has a past. A haunting, creepy past. Because there’s clearly more to the town of Flickerwood than meets the eye. In fact, a double murder may be just the tip of the iceberg…
I’ll let Her Royal Momness fill ya in on the longer version (before she’s late to the next appointment!):
Kimber here. Telling you about a very cool new book Her Royal Momness just read. (Well, it was mostly me. Mom helped. A little.)
First off, take a look at this cover. (That’s okay. I’ll wait.) Cuteness Alert! Well. Not as cute as me, ‘natch. But let’s not get picky here, okay?
Co-written by cancer survivor Dr. Kelly Curtin and her daughter Molly Hallinan, Molly and Potato is a book for the little ‘uns. It offers comfort. Connection. And canine companionship to families facing adversity and loss. I’m all over that “canine companionship” thing. But I’ll let She Who Must Be Obeyed fill ya in:
Note: We received a complimentary copy of this book for honest review.
Let’s just cut to the chase here, shall we? This book was a big disappointment. As in, Ugh! We had high hopes for Unbroken Bones. Overwritten, overlong and overdone, this book was a big disappointment.
To wit:
The story is told through the eyes of its three main characters: Natasha Cunningham, John, and Matthias the angel.
Natasha is a high school student interested in paleontology. Her mom Valerie could give the Polar Ice Caps a run for its money in the familial warmth department. Natasha finds a map in her grandmother’s Bible. With it, Natasha begins to unravel a family secret that holds the key to a major mystery.
John is Natasha’s project partner. He dislikes his competitive classmate and would rather ignore her. John has a prickly, irascible exterior to hide abuse from his alcoholic father. John is interning at the Natural History Museum. His supervisor is George. Who’s kind of a jerk. To put it charitably.
John and Natasha cross paths early on. Not so with Matthias.
Matthias is an angel whose alleged mission is to guard, protect and defend fallen humans. Think Clarence Oddbody, A.S. II. Only younger. We’re more than halfway through the book before Matthias does much of anything besides gawk and wonder and “Golly gee.” Think Gomer Pyle. It takes way too long for him to intersect with the kids. By then, we’ve lost interest.
There’s also Dr. Vanessa Cunningham, Natasha’s beloved grandmother. Grandma was a devout Christian and highly esteemed beloved scientist/researcher. A friend and colleague of Natasha’s scientist mentor, Dr. Betsy, Dr. Cunningham was killed in a tragic car accident.
Kimber the Magnificent
Or was it? An accident, that is. Like, what exactly was Dr. Cunningham working on? What did she discover? Did it get her killed? How? Why? Who? And what’s going on at Kennington Park?
There’s also “Old Ben.” Not a person. In case you’re wondering. Double chocolate mint ice cream. And a foot race between the Creator and Abner. Dreams. And… twins?
We loved the emphasis on education and staying in school a la John’s high school graduation in chapter 17. We did not love the pacing, which is right out of Slugville. The story itself could benefit from a case of Slim Fast.
So while the story is imaginative and creative and the writing is good, it just didn’t keep our interest. It’s hamstrung by uneven pacing and brittle characterizations. Like John’s dad, Kevin. We get it that Kevin is an abusive alcoholic. No need to beat us over the head with it – to the point of a caricatured cartoon. And the bones thing? It doesn’t really put in an appearance until chapter 21. Whether or not readers will stick around that long is open to question
Additionally, some readers may find the text preachy in places. That may be a turn-off. Like Pastor Anderson’s sermon in chapter 9. And the curious exegesis of the Old Testament story of Rahab. (Kimber: Guess what, Buttercup? Some of us can find the books of Joshua and Hebrews unaided. Oh yeah.)
There’s also the odd word choice/typo that pops up occasionally. Example: “… the idea that she might actually become his stepmother always drudged up feelings of anger within him” (p. 70). Or “Her mother had been too upset with her come” (p.166.)
We had to take a break from reading this book. It’s slow out of the gate. The first nine or ten chapters feel “boggy.” Like the author tried to cram in every conceivable detail under the sun in less than 100 pages.
Came back to it later, hoping it’d get better. Leaner. More mature. It picks up, yes. But not enough to rise to the level of “captivating.”
So again, we had high hopes for this book. It has This Present Darkness-ish potential with Matthias. (Kimber: We like, Totally Love-ify Frank Peretti!). But this character gets lost in the weeds.
Our biggest beef with this book? It just tries too hard. It can’t seem to decide what it wants to be: Fiction, social commentary, or homily? So it falls short in all three. Another problem is basic structure and mixed POVs. For instance, Natasha and John are third person. Matthias is first person. The inconsistency is jarring and doesn’t really work.
Bottom line: We could not force ourselves to finish this book. Frankly, we shouldn’t have to. We bailed out about page 230. (Kimber: That’s considerably more pages than most books get. In case you’re wondering, Cupcake.) So we won’t be rating this book. We will, however, be reaching for the Advil.
It’s been forever since we did a Fine Wine Friday post. So here ya go. No extra charge:
***
“Alright Kimber. Step away from the Narrative Non-Fiction (NNF) book stash and I’ll forget all about the incident with that double cheeseburger.”
“Drat! I was kinda hoping Mom already forgot about that. But anyway, you’re probably asking, What’s ‘narrative non-fiction’ and why should I care?”
Bet this tastes great if I can ever get it off the fence!
Glad you asked. Basically, narrative non-fiction is non-fiction that reads like a novel instead of a dry-as-burnt-toast textbook. Or War and Peace. ( Mom said I oughtta throw in that last one.)
Note: We received a complimentary copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.
Can a faded Polaroid and an inconspicuous thumb drive untangle a sophisticated web of deceit and corruption that spans centuries, continents, and the highest corridors of political power? And what about the shadowy organized crime ring known as the Saffron Veil, where “entrap, entangle, and extract” is the name of the game?
And the Veil is good at it.
So good, in fact, that when nineteen-year-old Maria Hernandez leaves El Salvador to pursue her dreams of Hollywood stardom, she falls prey to cut-throat coyotes – owned and operated by the Veil – who smuggle her across the border. But Maria never makes it to Tinseltown. She winds up in a California mansion, a victim of human trafficking. Pregnant, Maria escapes with a dangerous secret. She’s pursued by the powerful Senator Edward Grayson. (Kimber: This guy makes pond scum look good.)
Genre: Fiction – YA, Dystopian, Christan Speculative Fiction
Pages (print): 253
Via: Author Request
Note: We received a complimentary copy of this book for honest review.
Three young adults have magical-ish gifts. There’s a mysterious Prophecy. Some really, really bad fiery dudes in serious need of chill pills. And some other equally nasty types with red skin, black clothes and murderous intent.
Blurb:
Sophie and her friends have been captured and held prisoner for the purpose of obtaining intelligence they do not have. They have been burned, tortured, and abused for days right after having everything that they have ever known destroyed and taken away from them. They discover from a prophecy that mysteriously appeared to them in the night that they are destined to escape. Motivated with determination and purpose, they must develop a plan for freedom. What they don’t know is that past all the dangerous guards and the unsurpassable escape route is a surprise that will change their lives forever.
Note: We received a complimentary copy of this book in exchange for an honest review
Blurb:
The Lightshy Crow is the first novel in The Scarab Cycle, a mythic fantasy set in a crumbling empire where prophecy has soured and the gods no longer speak.
At its center is Tomrin Watersipper, a marked boy hiding cursed scales beneath his shirt that brand him for death. Trapped in a backwater glassworks, Tomrin dreams only of obscurity. But when the wrong eyes take notice, he must choose between exposure and annihilation.
Tomrin’s not the only one with secrets. In the Empire of Corundum, monsters wear the masks of men—and the line between divine and demonic is written in blood, silence, and fire.
Though set in a fictional realm, The Lightshy Crow explores real-world questions of faith, identity, and moral power without preaching or pandering. Just good writing and a world that hums with buried truth.
While it has its moments,The Lightshy Crow wasn’t our cuppa. For one thing, it’s way too long. Clocking in at over 600 print pages and 440+ pages on Kindle, this dark literary fantasy is a heavy lift. We just don’t have that kind of lift. Especially since our limit for Kindle submissions is 300 pages. We also found the plot hard to follow and slow. Think dark as a light-less coal mine at midnight during a tornado. Or a snail stuck in a molasses factory.
It just didn’t grab us. Not long enough to hang around till the 12th of Never. One of us doesn’t have that kind of patience. (Hi, Mom.) Bailed out at about 100 pages. So we won’t be rating this book.
However, if you enjoy dark fantasy with lots of magic and impressive world-building skills coupled with a complicated plot that could give Middle Earth a run for its money, you might enjoy The Lightshy Crow.
Ahoy summer readers and other lovelies! Today we’re clearing the decks to feature three recently read books. We’ll give you the lowdown so you know what’s hot and what’s not and can steer accordingly.
Sound good?
Cool. Here we go. We’re starting with a stinker so we get it out of the way first. Then we’ll move on to The Good Stuff:
Pages & Paws 