King the Wonder Dog and Other Stories
By Eleanor Lerman
Genre: Fiction/Short Story collection
Via: Publicist Request
Pages: Way too many
Note: We received a complimentary copy of this book for honest review.
“I’m awake! I’m awake!” harketh Her Momness.
“With your eyes closed? Snoring to beat the band?” says I, Kimber the Magnificent. Well, can’t say I blame Mom. Cuz this short story collection is the next best thing to Sominex. Here’s why:
Remember Casey at the Bat? “The outlook wasn’t brilliant for the Mudville nine that day: The score stood four to two, with but one inning more to play,…”
The Mudville team is trailing 4 to 2 with only one inning remaining. The crowd’s spirits plummet when two players fail to reach first base. But a flicker of hope ignites as Casey, their legendary star player, comes to the plate. The mighty Casey finally approaches the plate, exuding confidence. He haughtily ignores the first two pitches, allowing them to pass for strikes. With two strikes against him, the pressure mounts. Despite his formidable reputation and the fervent hopes of the entire town, Casey swings with all his might at the final pitch, “And now the pitcher holds the ball, and now he lets it go, And now the air is shattered by the force of Casey’s blow…”
Remember how that panned out?
That’s what King is like.
We agreed to take on an ARC of this book because it was allegedly “For readers who loved The Art of Racing in the Rain, a literary short story collection set in contemporary New York that surrounds a group of aging, lonely people who experience the unexpected healing power of pets.” And “Navigating loneliness and loss is a natural part of growing older, but it’s never easy. In King the Wonder Dog, this journey becomes more bearable for a group of men and women when their interactions with the dogs and cats that share their lives help them discover a deeper understanding of themselves.”
Based on this blurb, we thought it’d resonate. Especially since Mom is like, a million years old. What?
So imagine our surprise – and disappointment – when we found that this book isn’t really about “the unexpected healing power of pets.” Yes, most of the peeps in this book are in their late 60s/early 70s. So it spills a lot of ink about arthritis. Cataracts. Loneliness. Achy joints and stiff knees. “Medicine and death.” Being retired and bored. And, oh yeah! Some of these achy, stiffy, lonely retirees have a dog or cat!
The Truth and a BOD
Truth is, this is a collection of stories about humans and aging. Fine. But if you’re looking for a book about “lonely people who experience the unexpected healing power of pets,” keep looking. Cuz this ain’t it. Thus, it was a BOD (Big ‘Ole Disappointment). Hi, Mudville Nine.
Additionally, the title seems a bit off. Combined with the cover art, it suggests that the stories focus on dogs and their humans. Nah. Just kiddin’. Again. Stories are about humans. Dogs are incidental. Almost an after-thought. Background noise. Kimber: So. Not. Cool. And the cover art? Really? Talk about dark and brooding. Kinda like this book. There’s also needless profanity. So additional demerits there.
Old, Tired
Moreover, alot of the stories are snoozers. They start strong. Then they get lost in the weeds. They meander. Fizzle. And just sort of stutter to a stop. Like they ran out of gas before they ran out of story. Worse, these stories made one of us – the one with opposable thumbs – feel old and tired. We kinda hate that.
Recurring motif: Senior man or woman looks back on their life. Reminisces about how he or she landed their first job. Got promoted. Married/divorced. Retired. Lives alone. Feels lousy, physically, mentally, emotionally and socially. Gets a dog. Variations: Vietnam vet. High school English class reminiscences. Fence repair, a pit bull and an “oaf.” Covid. Long Covid. Post-Covid. Here a Covid, there a Covid. Everywhere a Covid, Covid.
There. Just saved you about 220 pages. And a whole lot of batting practice.
Meanwhile, Back in Caseyland
Besides fanning at the plate, much of this collection is straight outta Dullsville. As inspiring as a plateful of wilted cabbage. We gave this book multiple chances. Cuz we were hoping to meet more dogs. Hear their stories. But there wasn’t enough meat on the narrative bones to keep us engaged. In fact, we had to force ourselves to finish this book. Never a good sign. Any other book does that, it’s hie thee to thy nearest DNF pile or batting cage, pronto! Or as they say in Caseyland:
But there is no joy in Mudville—mighty Casey has struck out.
Pages & Paws 