The Terror

By Dan Simmons (Little, Brown and Company, 2007)

Genre: Historical Fiction/Thriller, Adventure Fiction Horror Fiction

Pages: 766

Via: Library

Hey, Kimster! Is the tea hot yet? And will you kindly quit hogging the fleece blankie?

Bother. The things I do for Mom. We’re both hunkering down to read this gripping and intense tale of mind-numbing cold, desperation, myth, legend and survival by Dan Simmons.

The Basics

First, if you’ve never heard of Franklin’s ill-fated expedition, The Terror might be a good place to start. We were pretty familiar with the history before starting the book. So some bias there.

Before we dive in to specifics, you may want to know that The Terror is a fictionalized account of Sir John Franklin’s lost expedition to the Arctic to find the Northwest Passage. The expedition’s two ships are the HMS Erebus and HMS Terror. Franklin is the overall expedition commander. James Fitzjames captains the Erebus. Franics Crozier captains the Terror. They set out to find the elusive Northwest Passage in 1845. The ships – and all hands – disappeared without a trace in the summer of 1848.

Stuck in the ice, officers and crew are plagued by starvation, illness (scurvy and consumption), unrelenting cold, arrogance, and physical and mental deterioration. After abandoning ship, they must also contend with mutiny, murder, and cannibalism as they’re stalked by a terror-inducing “thing on the ice.”

5 Things

Still with us? Good! Then grab the nearest hot cuppa and another blankie. Cuz there are a few things you oughtta know about The Terror right off the bat. It may save ya some time. So let’s go to it, shall we? Like this:

1. At 766 pages (print) this is a prodigious and sometimes unwieldy read (more on that later). At any rate, it’s looong. Voluminous. Not a coffee table type book, if ya know what we mean. Just sayin’.
2. The pacing is uneven. Sometimes it’s lightning-quick. At other times it moves with the speed of a growing redwood.
3. It’s intense. Detailed. Grim. This will appeal to some HF readers but may have others yawning.
4. The latter chapters include a heavy dose of mystical mumbo-jumbo that pretty much diminishes the seriousity of the subject. Too bad.
5. The title has a double meaning. Maybe treble.

In terms of structure, the story shifts POVs between key personalities. Each chapter tells events through the lens of one individual. The next chapter sometimes relates the same events through the eyes of another individual. It’s a literary device that’s probably meant to convey a well-rounded, three-dimensional viewpoint. But it gets redundant and round-about quickly. POVs include Sir John Franklin, Captain Crozier, and the private diary entries of Dr. (or “Mister”) Goodsir, ship’s surgeon.

Tiresome

The thing on the ice – “Something huge, white and grey and powerful” – is effective the first few dozen times Simmons trots it out. But it gets old. Fast. It’s like the author couldn’t think of any other way to create a rising line of tension or conflict, so: Cue Thing Sighting on Aisle 9! It’s over-used and tiresome after a while. Spoiler: It’s not until page 682 that we learn that the “thing on the ice” is a literary device invented by Simmons based on Eskimaux myth and legend.

There. Just saved you almost 700 pages. You’re welcome.

Later

The book winds down a few years after Crozier has given the order to abandon ship (Franklin is deceased) and all hands are sledging heavy boats overland in a desperate race against time, illness, weather, and a bunch of other stuff to find rescue or safe haven. It’s not long before hope sputters, dims, and dies in the middle of one of the most hostile places on earth. No survivors. But maybe….?

A few years later, Crozier is now 50-ish, married, and a tongueless mute. He has chosen to live on the ice in exile with the Eskimaux rather than return to England and face a court-marital, etc. (Remember, it’s historical fiction.)

Crozier has survived an assassination attempt by mutinous crew members and has been rescued by an “Eskimaux wench” he previously sheltered aboard the Terror. Crozier communicates with his teenage Eskimaux wife, Silna, formerly Lady Silence, via “thought-sending.” It’s pretty ridiculous, even for fiction. Worse, the writing at this point is so overblown and overlong, it’s as cumbersome as a ten year supply of old kitty litter.

Doneski!

But even though the narrative is a couple hundred pages-ish too long by now, Simmons just can’t resist having Crozier return to his old ship, Terror, and set it on fire. It sinks. This is all part of some kind of magical, mystical new relationship he has with his soul. Or maybe it’s Silna’s soul? Or maybe it’s the ice? Or too much seal blubber? We don’t really know. And frankly (pun intended), we don’t really care. We’re just glad this thing is finally over. Doneski. So outta here.

So. Not. Impressed

Now, in case you’re wondering, this puppy was a “national bestseller.” Well, whoop-de-do. Cuz ya know that doesn’t mean squat around here.

Mixed

So we have mixed feelings about The Terror. On the one hand, it’s well-written and colorful, with a storyline that pulls you in and keeps you turning pages most of the time. It’s also based on one of the worst losses of human life in an arctic expedition on record, one that continues to remain largely shrouded in mystery to this day.

Bouillabaisse

But parts of this book are just too long, too graphic, too excessively profane, and too R-rated. Think Bouillabaisse. As in, everything we hate in one dish. Ugh.

So, do we recommend The Terror? Only if you’re stuck kitty-sitting the neighbor’s feline. Or don’t have much else calendared for the next half-year or so. Zzzzzz….

Kindly hand me another blankie…

Our Rating: 2.0

Have you read a “bestseller” that wasn’t all it’s cracked up to be? What?